Breakfast of Legends – Red Porridge

July 14, 2012

D Man’s all time favourite colour is red. Everything is red. Even blue things are red.

He loves red shoes, red pants, red cars and, although fond of all hats, his favourite – by a country mile – Β is his red fire chief hat.

I’ve been feeling like a bit of a fraud lately, you know being a foody/mummy blogger and all…..It would seem that D Man’s tastes have changed and my toddler, who was eating sushi back when his peers were eating rice smoosh and mashed everything (he didn’t use chopsticks though, just in case you were going to call Ripley), has become a bit picky.
I hate picky eaters, as much as I hate dog poo so I sincerely hope it’s just a passing phase.

He still eats sushi with gusto, and pretty much anything that can be eaten on the run with his hands. I think it’s mostly because he’s just so damn busy all the time. He’s currently a cracking multi-tasker. Playing with blocks, whilst watching tv, whilst eating something that will leave crumbs all over the Persian, whilst probably filling his pants.
I wonder if he’ll continue to be able to multi task as he gets older? I think it’s something that most guys lose the ability to do by about 4…..but I digress.
Breakfast has been a real bitch. He might have a couple of bites of toast, a few nuts or half a banana, but he’s gone from devouring large amounts of breakfast to picking like a supermodel. When I asked him yesterday what he wanted for breakfast, he answered,


What the f&*k is red? Red is not a food? But instead of going into the semantics of the English language I thought perhaps I could accommodate my little red-loving friend. I made us red porridge….apples, berries and some food colouring. Figured he’d poo poo it and I’d end up eating the lot, but I’m ok with red porridge.

He noshed that red pap right up, muttering “Yummy, red. Niiice”, like a mini, blonde Yoda.

I sure fixed his little red wagon, so to speak.

This morning, when I asked him what he wanted he said, for the first time EVER,


When I put his bowl of banana, date and blue porridge in front of him, he breathed a happy sigh and said,

“Mmmm, red’.

Little weirdo.

So, today’s recipe is nothing amazing for people with no kids (perhaps inner children will be excited?), but for people with kids, this may revolutionise your mornings. If you’re going to be all ‘oh no, we don’t do food colouring because it’s unnatural, and stuff’, then fine. Stick to grey old porridge.
I ain’t bovvered.

Yield : enough for he and me (yes, grammar spotters – I KNOW!)

You will need :

  • 1/2 cup oats
  • 1 cup milk
  • 1 small red apple, grated
  • 1/2 cup frozen berries, chopped
  • a few drops of red food colouring

Do you really need me to tell you? Ok, I’d better, just to keep up appearances.

Place all of the ingredients into a pan and cook until thickened, and squidgy. Like porridge…..but red.

Other rocking combinations are banana and date (and blue, if you so desire), and pear and apricot (yellow, I would say – but there are no rules)

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  • Reply Jeni July 14, 2012 at 8:11 am

    I know EXACTLY what you mean! About “squidgy” as a doneness descriptor, and about the ever-shifting nature of a toddler’s gustatory preferences.

  • Reply Little Sis July 14, 2012 at 9:08 am

    LOL. I have one who is now five and has admitted that the five things she likes to eat do change, almost every day. It’s exhausting for those of us who really just like food and would be delighted if someone else would make it for US. πŸ™‚

  • Reply Sesame July 14, 2012 at 12:52 pm

    Brilliant! You’ve got a great blog here. I love reading about other moms’ experiences, so I’ll be keeping up with you and your family’s adventures! (And thanks for your comment on my blog!)

  • Reply Jet Wiksten July 14, 2012 at 2:17 pm


    Terra (my three year old) refuses to eat fish. “It was a nice fish,” she always tells me. Well, now it’s a dead fish and it died in vain if it’s just going to sit there on your plate, I want to tell her, but she says it so sincerely! Strangely enough she hasn’t a problem with eating any other dead animals. I won’t push it!

    • Reply Keeping Up With The Holsbys July 14, 2012 at 2:26 pm

      When you’re ready to give it another crack my nutty home made fish finger recipe is a winner, if you’re keen? They’re funny little creatures, aren’t they? Always something funny being said!

      • Reply Jet Wiksten July 14, 2012 at 10:39 pm

        I should’ve started my quote book a long time ago!

        I’d love to try your recipe, is it posted on here? I cannot seem to find it. My daughters are aching to eat your Whore’s Lasagne πŸ˜‰

  • Reply Fabulous Mommy July 16, 2012 at 12:20 am

    Reblogged this on Fabulous Mommy's Blog and commented:
    This is one of those “that is bloody brilliant why didn’t I think of that” posts.

    I just know that there is going to be all sorts of coloured foods in our future.

    For now the boys are content to eat whatever I put in their hands but I know there will be a time where they hit a picky stage and then I’ll pull this out as a secret weapon.

    Also this post made me laugh.

    • Reply Keeping Up With The Holsbys July 16, 2012 at 12:59 pm

      Thanks for the reblog! I’m totally moving onto green eggs and ham next!!
      You need a few tricks up your sleeve…. Always!!

  • Reply pamiejane July 30, 2012 at 11:03 pm

    You are a genius!

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