My head

A Letter to Me on my 37th Birthday

July 7, 2013

me on my 37th birthdayHi you,

Happy birthday, dude.

37 fricken’ years old. Crazy! You still feel fifteen half of the time, hell, you still act fifteen three-quarters of the time. You’re just as confused about what you want to be and do when you grow up…. maybe it’s time to face that you’ll never grow out of that? That is, unless you become super-mega amazing at one thing and hit stratospheric heights of success doing it.

You’re doing good though. You’re trying, you know? You’re trying to keep it all together and be all grown up and shit, and I reckon most of the time you pull it off.  Most of the time is a pretty good effort, really.
Those other little moments where you fall apart don’t really count as anything other than testament to the fact that you’re a dramatic and emotional individual!

No one can possibly have it together 100% of the time. They just pretend they do, to keep up appearances.

You’ve had the toughest year of your life, to date. There’s no doubt about it. Health issues, your ring being stolen and subsequent legal shit, life….I think this year has been the biggest test of your marriage, but you know what? There will be other hard years too. I think the best thing to remember is, it’s just life.
We have shit in our lives, and we just have to work through it. It’s not just you, it’s everyone.

We all have shit and the only way is through.

Try to be kinder to yourself. You would never speak as harshly to a friend as you speak to yourself in your head. Be a better friend to yourself.

You’ve made some good friends in the last year and you’ve lost some people too. That’s ok. People come and go in life. You know who the important ones are. The ones that fill you with joy.

You need to remember to find solace in your own company also.
Stop filling up all of your time with people. It’s important to be quiet sometimes.

It’s also more important to be kind, than it is to be right.

I think that one of the biggest things you’ve learned this year.

You’ve done some big work on yourself in this past year, but it’s not time to get complacent. You’re a work in progress, my dear. You must be. If you ever stop growing and evolving then it might as well be game over. You haven’t learned everything yet, and you will make 100 more mistakes, put your foot in your mouth again and balls it up along the way.

Just stay open. Remember to be gracious, remember to stop and enjoy everything and not just rush along all the time. You’re at home with your children now so you can be there for them, so remember to do that. Take a breath sometimes and just chill out. I realise chillaxing is fairly against your character, but those quiet, simple moments are the golden ones. The ones you and your children will carry forth in your memories for years to come.

You’ve had a productive year, but the work is not finished. To truly create this space you wish for, you must not tire of the journey. True luck doesn’t really exist and you need to create your own luck. The best luck comes to the hardest workers.

Life is not easy, my friend, but it is wonderful, and wondrous. You have amazing, generous, loving people in your life, and you need to remember that in those maudlin moments. You are loved.

You’ve accomplished a lot in the last 12 months, so concentrate on what you have achieved and not on what you haven’t. Looking back at your last birthday letter, you’ve come a long way emotionally.

You need to lighten up a bit too, I reckon. Don’t take this wrong way but you’re a bit uptight. I’m sure the people closest to you would agree that you could afford to loosen your laces, toots.

Your life is rich.

Your life is wonderful.

Live it with integrity and courage.

All my love,


PS Stop being so bloody bah humbug about your birthday. It’s something to celebrate, for god’s sake, you old tart.

me on my 37th birthday

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  • Reply Sarah @ Slapdash Mama July 7, 2013 at 8:10 am

    Happy birthday you old boiler, as my mother would say.
    Onwards and upwards!

    • Reply Keeping Up With The Holsbys July 7, 2013 at 2:34 pm

      I love old boiler. It’s so apt!

      Sent from my iPhone

      On 07/07/2013, at 8:10 AM, Keeping Up With The Holsbys

  • Reply Roar Sweetly July 7, 2013 at 8:13 am

    Happy Birthday! I’m 38 but I feel so old…just very tired a lot of the time. I think losing my mum this year and all the physical energy to toddler wrangle, cook, clean, juggle work and home etc. If your’e feeling 15, you’re doing something right, and I want some of that! xo

    • Reply Keeping Up With The Holsbys July 7, 2013 at 2:33 pm

      Ok, I’m a tired 15 year old with crows feet!!

      Life is hard and wondrous. The only way is through xxx

      Sent from my iPhone

      On 07/07/2013, at 8:13 AM, Keeping Up With The Holsbys

  • Reply thecookingchook July 7, 2013 at 10:24 am

    Happy Birthday Danielle! It’s been a wonderful journey following you and your blog over the last year. You should be proud of what you have achieved so far 🙂

    • Reply Keeping Up With The Holsbys July 7, 2013 at 2:31 pm

      Thank you, my Favourite chicken!!

      Sent from my iPhone

      On 07/07/2013, at 10:24 AM, Keeping Up With The Holsbys

  • Reply [email protected] July 7, 2013 at 3:52 pm

    Happy Birthday Danielle! Loved reading this letter to yourself – all sounds oddly familiar!! It’s hard work this growing up thing I reckon! I turned 41 last year & had a belly full of arms & legs at 40 – something I never imagined!! Like you I feel lucky, loved & having little ones keeps me young – mostly anyway – or maybe it’s just that I am so tired all the time, I am delirious & laughing the laugh of the hysterical! ;). Either way I be smiling, so that can’t be all bad!! Enjoy your day – make sure you chillax – ‘k?! 🙂

  • Reply brivonn July 7, 2013 at 8:30 pm

    Happy birthday darling! Remember 37 is the new 22! Never feel old about yourself! You look awesome! 🙂

  • Reply sagescenery July 7, 2013 at 10:06 pm

    All God’s blessings for this year and for many, many more!! Definitely keep your sense of humor…I’ve found it really helps!! And oh,yes…the phrase from Scripture, “This too shall pass!” Happy Birthday!!

  • Reply Kelly M Hibbert July 7, 2013 at 11:46 pm

    Love the photo and your letter to yourself. It would be interesting to hear your thoughts on it in a few months time.

  • Reply lenyyusay July 8, 2013 at 3:23 pm

    Happy birthday! You are definitely loved and you have a good life. Celebrate!

  • Reply mumabulous July 8, 2013 at 5:01 pm

    Happy 37th birthday my young padwan. You’re not even ramping up to your peak yet. Loves (the older but not necessarily wiser) Mumabulous

  • Reply Nina July 9, 2013 at 2:22 am

    You, uptight? Well, lots of words of wisdom here for everyone, really. Thanks for the reminder to be kind to myself and talk to myself as I would a friend. Love it. And happy birthday my dear! Fifteen is looking good on you 🙂

  • Reply Maxabella July 14, 2013 at 10:15 am

    Happy birthday to you! If you just take on a tenth of the advice in this letter the year ahead will be merry and bright. What a good person you are, btw. x

  • Reply A letter to me on my 38th birthday | Keeping Up With The Holsbys July 7, 2014 at 7:42 am

    […] I want to take your mind back to your birthday last year. I think this last 365 days have potentially been the biggest, craziest, most momentous of your […]

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